Old Cars

A few years ago I got the chance to go to a Mecum Auto Auction down in Las Vegas, I've always loved old cars but this was the first time that I actually focused on all of the interesting angles and colors that you often find on old cars. I like to take photos at angles and distances that normally you wouldn't see and try to focus on different details and aspects.

A Word About Pitbulls

     This is my pit bull Hikari, i don't own her anymore because I felt that she deserved better than to be cooped up in apartment all day but she will always be my baby. I was thinking about ranting in this post about how people are always stereotyping bully breeds and how they never give them a fair chance and what not, but just looking at pictures of my sweet puppy makes me less angry. So I just want to say that if you've never owned a pit bull you're missing out.

     Hikari was one of the sweetest dogs I ever owned or had the chance to know. I've met a lot of pit bulls since giving Hikari away and all of them have had much the same temperament. They are all lovey dovey and the only danger they posed is that they might lick you to death. 

     Not only was she so loving but she was fairly easy to train as long as I did my part. She was way beyond smart. She was already sitting and staying on command at about 8 weeks. 

     Honestly though the greatest thing about her was that no matter how much she grew she was convinced that she was a lapdog. When she was still really little her favorite spot was actually to perch up on my shoulder like a cat. Once she got too big to do that she would flop on top of you pretty much crushing your legs. 

     In the future when I get another dog, it's going to be a pit bull. No matter what other people tell you about pit bulls, I will tell you that you could not find a more loving trusting companion than I found in Hikari. 

Lightning Storm

I've always loved to sit and watch lightning storms, to me its very relaxing. These are my first try at lightning photography. Let me know what you think.

Things that should be said but usually aren't

           Life is hard, and more often then not it doesn't turn out the way you or anyone else expected it would. We try to get by the best we can thinking that if we can just be better or even perfect than somehow all the pieces will fall into place. That's what a lot of us are taught anyways. Do this good thing and you'll get the reward but if you fuck up then you get punished. It's time to stop living your life like that. The truth is that no one on this planet is perfect. People mess up its just a fact of life. People don't always live up to your expectations, sometimes they disappoint you, and sometimes they turn out to be a completely different person. You have to be able to accept these things and move on from there. Learn, grow, but don't ever let the bad things in life drag you down. The only punishment that comes from failure and sin and disappointment is the punishment you create yourself. Stop blaming yourself and other people instead lift yourself and others up. 
            For most of my life I hated myself. I grew up FLDS and also queer. On the inside at least. I could never share that major piece of me with anyone because i knew what they would tell me. That it was a sin, against god, against nature, and that I was going to go to hell for it. I spent my whole life trying to be what I wasn't because what I was wasn't good enough. Recently though I found my way out of that lifestyle and I found a new church, the christian church, and there I learned the truth about Christ's sacrifice for me. Yes, I am a sinner, but that does not mean that I am not good enough. I will always be good enough for him, and that is just so freeing. To know that there is someone who will pick me up and look me in the face and say, yeah you messed up, but I still love you and we can figure it out together. 
             That's how we all should live our lives. When someone messes up or like I said before, maybe they do something that makes you look at them like they're a completely different person. Don't turn your back on them, give them a hug and tell them, it's ok we'll figure it out together.
Shit happens, mistakes are made, and somewhere during that we forget to love. 

Midnight Musings

       Technically its actually 2:36 in the morning but that's not really the point. The point is that it is the middle of the night and I am awake yet again. Usually the only reason I'm awake at this time of night is because I'm checking on old people every two hours. Tonight however I'm off work and I'm awake because my brain just won't shut up. I'm sure most everyone can relate to that.
        I have so many ideas right now for the book I'm writing and no where to put them. I always think of these really great parts that I know will fit in later in the story but since I'm not to that part of the story I don't write them down and so they end up floating around in my head and keeping me awake into the unholy hours of the morning. Writing is hard. I always heard that a lot but now that I'm actually attempting it I can assure you, they were right. Writing a story is like writing one of those 2,000 word essays for english 1010 only on some serious steroids. You have to figure out your plot and your characters. You have to choose a setting and a time period. You have to do research. So. Much. Research. If you're writing a mystery novel for example and your browser history makes you look like an aspiring serial killer you're doing it right. You have to get to know your character, you have to be able to relate to them on some level. (Unless your novel involves a murderous character in which case please don't relate to your character) This is only about half of what is keeping me up though and I can't even solve this problem because I'm stuck on about oh, page four of chapter one, and its almost literally driving me crazy.
        Usually I would just read one of the many books on my shelf until I fell asleep but I'm in the middle of the Inkheart trilogy and so I don't want to start a new series. I'm actually one of those crazy people who saw the movie before reading the book, and trust me, I regret it. To be fair though when the movie came out I didn't know that it was based on a book. Now that I've read the actual book I have a hard time seeing how that movie was as popular as it was. If you've read the book you'll hopefully agree with me. Some movies based on books are just so bad you kind of want to erase them from your mind so you can go back to enjoying the book without it being tainted by crappy casting and unnecessary angst. I'm going off point here but essentially, I hate the movie, love the book and I'd be reading the sequel right now if Amazon didn't take so long to ship things or if Barnes and Noble actually carried the Inkheart trilogy. Now the only angsty thing is me cause I'm lacking the reading material I want.
          So now you know what keeps this random blogger up at night. Who knows, maybe my late nights might help me focus some of my thoughts and I could actually get some writing done. Or maybe not, but here's to hoping.

Time to reorganize

I just got quite a few books for my birthday and ended up buying a new bookshelf that could actually fit all of the books I had already as well as the ones I just got which meant I had to reorganize everything. Which was fun I love going through my books and moving them around it keeps the dust from collecting and makes my room smell like a library. I know everyone likes to organize their books differently for me I like to organize them in catagory and by how often I read them so it seems confusing but makes perfect sense to me. :)

Winter Photos

Okay so I've had some trouble getting on lately. I had an accident in December and the ensuing insurance problems and arguing that came after has kept me pretty occupied so you can expect a lot of posts fairly quickly now. To start I've got some winter pics, seeing as we didn't have much of a winter this year some of them are actually from a couple of years ago but they are still wintry and pretty so I hope you enjoy.